Monday, January 10, 2011

The day I woke up with a silly mood

I don't know what it means to live day by day yet I decided today to live as such, to live today. But in what sense? does it mean, not to think about tomorrow? or not to plan for next week or next year? or not to care for yesterday or last year? or is it rather not to worry about the after? For some, it could mean no more than to put food on the table today and God helps tomorrow. For others it is merely to take Nancy out today and worry about Carla tomorrow. But for me this morning, it just meant to wake up and try to lead a normal day, a day I would not care to remember. I told myself: today, live with no aim, delete the word purpose from your dictionary, and let dreams be your worst enemy. Ask no questions and look for no answers. Just wake up and let each breath bring you a new fragrance, open your eyes and see (as Saramago says), listen to the music in words and forget the words, just be led by your senses. Carpe Diem? I wondered. Maybe. But it is funny when you think that the more you live by Carpe Diem the less you might leave this world with a mark, the less you will be remembered over the ages. But who cares if your life was watched in a film strip or read in a book or searched over the internet a hundred years after you are gone. You are gone. Maybe it is not important after all to leave a mark in life, maybe, it is more important that life leaves marks on you.

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